The Importance of Transparency in Relationships (+ an Inspirational Poem: ONE DAY)

The Importance of Transparency in Relationships

What is transparency in relationships?

Transparency is defined as total honesty. It involves being completely authentic and genuine with others, in all relationships.

And you know me, I’m always transparent, regardless of what I’m sharing (whether it’s good OR bad).

A Podcast with Jess about Transparency in Relationships

Transparency in relationships was the topic of the discussion I had with Jess Dewell from The Voice of Bold Business during a podcast she recorded in February 2018.

You can listen to the podcast conversation on:

The Voice of Bold Business website

YouTube (or watch it here!)

I Reveal a Secret in this Podcast

Out of the blue, I revealed a secret in this podcast. Okay, it’s not really a secret, but it is something I have never talked about online before.

It was a choice I made (and later regretted) when my grandmother died.

Years ago, when my grandmother died, I was living out of town, teaching high school in a small town called Fort Frances. During the March break of 2002, I planned a week-long trip to Winnipeg. My plans were to send my son home to Thunder Bay and let my mom take care him during my trip.

Then my Grandma (my mom’s mom) died. And I was faced with a decision: Go on my trip or return home for her funeral service?

I chose to go ahead with my planned vacation… for a few reasons.

The Reasons for My Decision

1: She was not the same Grandma anymore.

My grandma had been in a nursing home for years. She had fallen a couple of times and suffered various injuries. One of the consequences was slight brain damage. She became a different person than the Grandma I used to know, and she remained that way for years… until her death.

2: I needed a vacation.

I had been working very hard for months. I was stressed out. I needed a break.

It’s as simple as that.

3: I thought my Grandma would want me to go.

In my mind, I thought, “Just because her life is over doesn’t mean mine should stop.” I honestly believed she would have wanted me to go and enjoy myself… to live life to the fullest!

The Guilt I Felt

I went on my trip, but I didn’t enjoy it.


I felt guilty. Very guilty. Not just because I missed my grandmother’s funeral service, but because I realized (too late) that I should have been there for my mom. Instead, I made my mom look after my son while I went on my trip.

This was very selfish of me. I know that now. In fact, I discovered that during the beginning of my trip, as soon as the guilt started eating away at me.

Each March since my Grandma Helen died, I feel this guilt. I’ve talked to my mom about it, too. I apologized for my selfish actions. We discussed my regret. And she forgave me. (At least, she said she did.)

But I still feel feelings of guilt and regret every year. I probably always will.

What I Learned

I learned to make better decisions and to try to NOT have any regrets from the choices I make.

Honesty quote

I also learned that I needed to listen to others on a deeper level.

Listening in this manner allows us to create a deeper connection to that person.

Jess summed this up nicely when she said, “When we can listen without judgment, we can create a deeper connection with another that allows for more transparency.”

Jess Dewell quote

One Day is an Inspirational Poem (and Video!)

Prior to the podcast on the importance of transparency in relationships I did with Jess, I thought about some of the things we were going to discuss.

I ended up becoming inspired and wrote a poem called One Day. I even made a video of it.

Watch it here or on YouTube:

Moving Forward with Transparency in Relationships

I have been transparent with everyone since I began blogging online back in 2013.

As I move forward with my life, I will continue to be transparent, honest, authentic, and genuine with everyone.

What are YOUR Thoughts about Transparency in Relationships?

I’d love to know. Please share them in the comments.

And let me know if you liked the podcast.

FYI, Jess would appreciate it if you could subscribe to her Youtube channel, share a review on Stitcher, or rate the show on iTunes. You can also find her on I heart radio.

You might also enjoy some of the other podcasts I’ve done:

I spoke with Maxwell Ivey, on his podcast. Watch and listen to What’s Your Excuse? with guest Lorraine Reguly here.

I was also on the My Future Business Show Podcast with Rick Nuske.

And I did two other podcasts (with two different messages).

Yeah, I’ve been busy talking to a lot of people! 😉

Now I’d like to talk to you, so let’s chat in the comments!

Author: Lorraine Reguly

Lorraine Reguly, BA/BEd, is an author and an English teacher-turned-freelancer for hire who offers 4 different services on Wording Well: writing (including blogging and ghostwriting); editing; and mentoring. She also helps others become published authors! Check out her services and see what she can do for you to help you!

8 thoughts on “The Importance of Transparency in Relationships (+ an Inspirational Poem: ONE DAY)

  1. Donna Merrill

    Hi Lorraine,

    Wow..that’s a lot of time carrying around that guilt. If your mom forgave you, forgive yourself. Forgive yourself because what’s done is done and you know you have to move on.

    We all made decisions like this in the past, but we must forgive ourselves for making that choice. You have been transparent since I’ve known you and maybe that piece of guilt has taught you this wonderful lesson.

    Just Say’n.

    Donna Merrill recently posted…How to do Successful Blog Commenting

    1. Lorraine Reguly Post author

      Thank you for this lovely comment.
      Guilt is something I struggle with each year at this time of year. My mom said she forgave me, but I don’t think she really did. I think she, too, wishes I would have made a different decision back then. But she lets things go more easily than I do. It’s just who we are.
      I appreciate your kindness, regardless. I know I am too hard on myself, sometimes. Most times, actually.
      And yes, I’ve been transparent in all of my interactions online. Thank you for noticing and saying so. It feels good to be appreciated for my honesty.
      Keep sayin’. 😉

  2. Gaurav Kumar

    Hi Lorraine,

    I always fall for inspirations, and it helps me gain more than I ever demanded. I always appreciate those who inspire me. I must say now you are one of them.

    There was a time when I was living with regrets, but the day I learned to live life with appreciation my life changed.

    Thanks for sharing. Also, like new theme of your blog.

    1. Lorraine Reguly Post author

      Gaurav, I worked hard to find a theme I liked and I am happy to hear you like it too! Thanks for the compliment!

      Also, it is nice to hear that you see me as an inspiration. It’s tough to get through the hard times, but when we have someone we can turn to, who understands, it’s so much easier. I appreciate your comment. 🙂 Please DO visit again!

  3. sudhaara

    Hi Lorraine,

    I always fall for inspirations, and it helps me gain more than I ever demanded. I always appreciate those who inspire me. I must say now you are one of them.


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