What is transparency in relationships?
Transparency is defined as total honesty. It involves being completely authentic and genuine with others, in all relationships.
And you know me, I’m always transparent, regardless of what I’m sharing (whether it’s good OR bad).
A Podcast with Jess about Transparency in Relationships
Transparency in relationships was the topic of the discussion I had with Jess Dewell from The Voice of Bold Business during a podcast she recorded in February 2018.
You can listen to the podcast conversation on:
YouTube (or watch it here!)
I Reveal a Secret in this Podcast
Out of the blue, I revealed a secret in this podcast. Okay, it’s not really a secret, but it is something I have never talked about online before.
It was a choice I made (and later regretted) when my grandmother died.
Years ago, when my grandmother died, I was living out of town, teaching high school in a small town called Fort Frances. During the March break of 2002, I planned a week-long trip to Winnipeg. My plans were to send my son home to Thunder Bay and let my mom take care him during my trip.
Then my Grandma (my mom’s mom) died. And I was faced with a decision: Go on my trip or return home for her funeral service?
I chose to go ahead with my planned vacation… for a few reasons.
The Reasons for My Decision
1: She was not the same Grandma anymore.
My grandma had been in a nursing home for years. She had fallen a couple of times and suffered various injuries. One of the consequences was slight brain damage. She became a different person than the Grandma I used to know, and she remained that way for years… until her death.
2: I needed a vacation.
I had been working very hard for months. I was stressed out. I needed a break.
It’s as simple as that.
3: I thought my Grandma would want me to go.
In my mind, I thought, “Just because her life is over doesn’t mean mine should stop.” I honestly believed she would have wanted me to go and enjoy myself… to live life to the fullest!
The Guilt I Felt
I went on my trip, but I didn’t enjoy it.
I felt guilty. Very guilty. Not just because I missed my grandmother’s funeral service, but because I realized (too late) that I should have been there for my mom. Instead, I made my mom look after my son while I went on my trip.
This was very selfish of me. I know that now. In fact, I discovered that during the beginning of my trip, as soon as the guilt started eating away at me.
Each March since my Grandma Helen died, I feel this guilt. I’ve talked to my mom about it, too. I apologized for my selfish actions. We discussed my regret. And she forgave me. (At least, she said she did.)
But I still feel feelings of guilt and regret every year. I probably always will.
What I Learned
I learned to make better decisions and to try to NOT have any regrets from the choices I make.
I learned to seek therapy when I needed it. (You can, too. You can use BetterHelp for this.)
I also learned that I needed to listen to others on a deeper level.
Listening in this manner allows us to create a deeper connection to that person.
Jess summed this up nicely when she said, “When we can listen without judgment, we can create a deeper connection with another that allows for more transparency.”
One Day is an Inspirational Poem (and Video!)
Prior to the podcast on the importance of transparency in relationships I did with Jess, I thought about some of the things we were going to discuss.
I ended up becoming inspired and wrote a poem called One Day. I even made a video of it.
Watch it here or on YouTube:
Moving Forward with Transparency in Relationships
I have been transparent with everyone since I began blogging online back in 2013.
As I move forward with my life, I will continue to be transparent, honest, authentic, and genuine with everyone.
What are YOUR Thoughts about Transparency in Relationships?
I’d love to know. Please share them in the comments.
And let me know if you liked the podcast.
You might also enjoy some of the other podcasts I’ve done:
I spoke with Maxwell Ivey, on his podcast. Watch and listen to What’s Your Excuse? with guest Lorraine Reguly here.
I was also on the My Future Business Show Podcast with Rick Nuske.
Yeah, I’ve been busy talking to a lot of people! 😉
Now I’d like to talk to you, so let’s chat in the comments!